Sunday, March 29, 2009
it's a homeleave of school needs !
i went to causewaypoint directly after i reach home and had a bathe :)
going out without any makeup put on ! what a awkward feeling ..
currently reading vivianchanxinning blog and i like her song !
yesterday i saw zhiyen with her new boyfriend and her friends . HAIS .
if i did not step on the path of ahlian , i would be like her today , taking O level this year !
that moment ; make me sunddenly felt regret again .
A BETTER FUTURE ? where is it , right ahead ? all are just unexplainable :(
finally i've got news about my school , the following tuesday going to school for interview .
its 1 more day from now , i'm really very scare !
sometimes , i realised that when we don't get what we want we grumble BUT
at the same time when we recieved what we want , we became afraid to face and accept it .
why is life in this way ? i just don't seems to understand !
i've just recieve a call that winnie coming back on the 9th APRIL 2009 .
i'm feeling happy for her larhs !
i called him yesterday , we didn't really talk much and by right now i should be talking to him .
but HAIS never mind , i think it's all useless !!
i don't really wnat to bother anymore . i shall settle my school things first ,
shouldn't let all these matter be the distraction of me going ahead of my life !
TWIN AND BLOOD ; i really don't know when then i can meet them ..
in 20 minutes time , i'm gonna start preparing and go back again !!
going back is just like waking up from a big and wonderful dream .
again 163 more days to discharge ; 12 more days to my next homeleave -
i'm hoping that by then i'm already at DRS and coming out every weekend :))
after 1 year 7 months surviving in admission ; i've learnt alot of things but i'm truly tired !
i really hope i can move on quickly for my next 4 months plus and finish off my sentence .
my buddy xiaojia is back in girl's home and i'm feeling happy for her too :))
will my interview be a success one and return back to school as soon as possible ??
that's what i've thinking all these while !! now feeling kinda snob over this matter ..
hopefully everything is going to be a fine one for me . i shall not think so much already !!
yesterday i bought all my needs for school , but it's all my favourites ; MICKEYMOUSE <33
BAG ` PENCILBOX ` STATIONERIES ` UMBRELLA !
a SKULL watch and i've not bought a WALLET that is mickey designed :((
yesterday was a big fun day , i bought 3 new top and it only cost me 30 bucks :D
a sudden urge telling me that there's no true friends that comes into my life -
i do not know what's the main reason that make me feel this way .. BUT i know it's true !
who's the one that is going to waste their time to spent on accompanying me going through all ?
to lead me to a right path and walk through together ?
LIFE IS JUST SO UNPREDICTABLE !!!!!!!!
girl's home schedule is forever no changes , waking up everyday and facing the same thing
AGAIN & AGAIN & AGAIN . it's a continuous system !
i went seeing tayyiting blog too ; i heard my favourite song :)
it's all full of memories again ` all just about her past with aubrey and friends .
BUT she 's now willing to accept that it's all memories that are abandon behind her and him !
the same goes to me .
A H B E N * it's all over , it faded as time goes by .
STOP PESTERING ME MAN !!!!!!!!!!
now , it's a new beginning and a new me to start - X I A O N A <3
i'm just a simple girl yearning for someone to lean on when she cries ;
hoping that someone would bother to care and love her ;
awaiting that someone will stand by her and get her through everything !
it's just as simple as that but why does it seems to turn out to be so difficult ??
SHE'S still sitting , staring , thinking and waiting **
NOTHING MORE THAN THESE , queen is not easy-being :((
Y
PaintMeAnILLUSION
4:28 PM
Saturday, March 28, 2009
THERE"S STILL LOTSA AND LOTSA OF THINGS WHICH I"VE BOUGHT FOR MY SCHOOLING NEEDS BUT I JUST TOO LAZY TO TAKE PHOTOS OF THE OTHERS ! MICKEY. I'm LOVING HIM <33
SOMETIMES IT'S BETTER TO PREVENT THINGS FROM BEING SO CLEAR :DIS JUST LIKE SOME WORDS ARE BETTER TO LEFT UNSAID ;
AND I WILL EVEN RATHER STAY BLUR AND UNCONSCIOUS ALL THE WAY !!
IT"S MIIE , MAKING MY TRIP TOWARDS CAUSEWAYPOINT WITHOUT MAKEUP & YA ;
I AM FINALLY WILLING TO WEAR MY SPECTACLES :))
Y
PaintMeAnILLUSION
4:47 AM
Sunday, March 15, 2009
everything seems to change after 1 night :)
i'm now satisfied and contented with what i have !
IMISSHIM*
but i just can't seem to get through him .
hais , 4 and 1/2 more hours to leave my house and proceed back to SGH :((
i really can't bear to leave him alone out there !
frankly speaking , the temptation is real big but i must overcome it this time round .
for the sake of myself , family and HIM* , ENDURE !!!
from yesterday afternoon 4plus , enjoy talking to him until today morning 8am !
NOW ! he is missing in action ; i have been calling him since 11plus , no reply at all :((
kinda worry about him .
he went drinking so much yesterday night with friends and all the way never sleep .
I'M AFRAID THAT HE IS SICK !
but i do not have a choice to stand by him to take care of him personally .
after so long , finally i 'm left with less than 200days :))
177 more days to go ; 5 months plus !
when then i can go down DRS ? i'm kinda bored over the life in admission already !
ACO and CASEWORKER , still mention noting and i know nothing too but WAIT again..
differentiating the benefits of admission and DRS ; it's really too far apart to be compared !
i want my freedom , studies and everything ***
from 2days1night every 2nd and 4th week of the month
- TO -
3days2nights every week of the month * BIG DIFFERENCE
i want to spend more time to be with him and i don't want him to feel neglected .
i promise ! i mean my words to stay truthful and faithful to him !!
no matter what , it will never change unless he choose to let go :))
HOW IS HE RIGHT NOW ??
shower me with unconditional loves*
QUEENA<3HIMHIMHIM*
Y
PaintMeAnILLUSION
2:02 PM